gearheads and monkeywrenches

dadsaretheoriginalhipster:

Your dad had a late model BMW before you did and he’s got the speeding tickets to prove it. It was just a machine before he took command of the wheel and proved it was the Ultimate. James Bond didn’t have shit on him. He was a bottle-popping international man of mystery with a license to thrill. His stone pulse, steady hands, and full-throttle foot helped him high speed dance his car around the streets while seducing honey-dips with his shift skills. He lived 100mph life while everyone else was stuck in neutral.
So hipsters, when you’re cruising down the block in your beat-ass beemer and trying to impress the fairer kind with the fact that you’ve traded up from your fixie, remember this…
Your dad is the only man who knows how those mystery stains in the backseat got there.

Your dad had a late model BMW before you did and he’s got the speeding tickets to prove it. It was just a machine before he took command of the wheel and proved it was the Ultimate. James Bond didn’t have shit on him. He was a bottle-popping international man of mystery with a license to thrill. His stone pulse, steady hands, and full-throttle foot helped him high speed dance his car around the streets while seducing honey-dips with his shift skills. He lived 100mph life while everyone else was stuck in neutral.

So hipsters, when you’re cruising down the block in your beat-ass beemer and trying to impress the fairer kind with the fact that you’ve traded up from your fixie, remember this…

Your dad is the only man who knows how those mystery stains in the backseat got there.

Jun 1 2012 107 notes